Saturday Morning Quiet Time

     It's Quiet in our house, got my oils from Bath and Body Works burning, everyone is still asleep, except for the dog and I. I am sitting by the fireplace, (Yes, it is 36 degree's here) thinking today will be a pajama day! We all rented movies last night from Blockbuster, so we are squared away! May put on the fuzzy socks to do my homework later, but for now just wanted to write down my thoughts. It's funny to re-read this, and see the key words, fireplace, fuzzy socks, oil's burning, and my computer (writing)... for these are my "comforts", things that make me feel good inside! lol.... It is funny but I have passed these traditions on down to my girls, got we will grab a fuzzy blanket, socks, books, and something smelling good in a minute! Sometimes, it's the simple things in life that bring you the most comfort!

     I shared with you a few days ago, that I had a "visit" from my grandmother in my dreams! She is in Heaven, so our "visits" are few and far between, but I love those dreams that are so real, you actually have to think about, "Did this just happen?", or am I still dreaming. These are the dreams that you don't want to end. I think I have had one "visit" with Daniel since he has been gone, hoping to have more!

     Today I was thinking about my grandfather, "Papaw." Papaw was such a kind, patient man, who loved to just sit and talk, about each and everything we could think of! It's funny, I have had so many, many good memories of him. I still get that warm and fuzzy when I think of him, and how much I miss him! God is good, and I know that one day I will see him again, and have another talk! lol. He loved talking about John F Kennedy, when he was President, the books he read (mainly Louis L'Amour), cooking, and a vast of so many things. I miss his kind and gentle soul. I was so blessed as a child, I had great grandparents, and a wonderful relationship with them, I was even blessed with two sets of people, who took on the role of a grandparents, so I had "extras". I wish so much that my kids had that opportunity.

To wrap this up, I wanted to share a song that I love, it brings back a lot of good memories, and the questions asked in the song, is what I wonder (and wish) for today.

Enjoy~

Surreal Thoughts this Morning

     It has been a long month, first Ej turned 8 years old! This along with other things, has been difficult for me. Lately for me, life has been stirring rapidly. This month alone I personally knew of two births of new babies, and received the word that two people's life would be ending, according to God's Will. It's funny, there is no question about the babies birth, a time for joy, new love, and new opportunities for growth; but what about the two lives that are slowing down. A dear 92 year old woman, as expected, is ready to go home. Who can question that? I mean 92 years, I know she has seen a lot. My Godmother on the other hand is more troublesome for me. She is a little older than my mom, and has suffered many years with Congestive Heart Failure. Her .family has been gathered all week around her, spending every second that you can possibly get with your loved one. One minute her pulse is weak, and it is expected any moment that she will go, and later on that evening she has enough strength to ask her son to watch the television news. The very next day, she gets up and goes to the doctor, and now her family reports that she is in a confusion when she speaks, one minute making sense, and the other minute, talking about her conversation with her deceased parents. I think that has been one of God's greatest gifts to this family, one more opportunity with their momma, his wife, their sibling and friend. How in the world do you get ready to say good-bye to your momma? Worse yet, how do you prepare to say good-bye to your child, like my mother had to do? Getting old, is freaking me out. I think its not so much as the actual event of death that I am afraid of, its for the one's left behind. I know how devastating it is to lose someone.

     Lately, I have realized my kid's are growing up so fast. I logically understand that at the age of eleven and eight years old, they are still babies in terms of experience in this world. It is my job to protect them, love them, and bring them up safely without the trauma, that we adults spend the rest of our lives in therapy trying to get over. It is equally heart-wrenching to see your young adult children, struggle to figure out who they are, and what they want to be when they grow up. You want to make so many safe decisions for them, but somehow through it all, you find the strength to sometimes let them make their own mistakes.

     This morning I did something a little different with Elijah, I took the opportunity to "snuggle with him", and watched him sleep. Just quiet time, that we are so often in a hurry and miss. Rushing to get them up and ready to go somewhere, but today I didn't care, It was our time... didn't even matter if he was late for school, we had good quality time together. Oh, and by the way, he was still on time! lol....

It's amazing that I believe before forty years of age, life is/and was one big rush! Having children young, you never took the time to just enjoy them, it was always reaching from one goal to another. I remember watching my grandmother just sit and watch.... taking in every second of the situation that she had. Growing up, I always loved sitting and talking with older folks, and listening to their stories... it was those moments, that they had the opportunity to share with me, their "quiet moments" of life........

I take each day given to me and my loved one's on a whole new level, I just wanted to share my thoughts with you friends.

Peace

A Day When You Just Want To Scream, "Thank You Jesus!"

I know there are days when nothing trivial happens to put you on the edge of your seat, or opportunities for us to see the TRUE Grace of God, but today has not been one of those tthankful mornings! When I share with you, I want to be real! I want to expose my frailties, mistakes , good and bad judgement calls, just LIFE as it happens in my world!

It is so easy to get complacent as a parent, or careless, I must say..... Today I had one of those moments. EJ was at the bus stop and I was on the phone. I had told that boy about twenty or so times, to stay out of the road, stop climbing, stay in the grass.

Turned my back for a second, and apparently EJ was doing the balancing act of the curb, and almost lost his balance with a car coming! To make matters worse, my husband for some reason came home for something, and saw the whole thing! Icing on the cake!
There was a poem written some time ago reflecting of the concept of what time really meant! I will try and find it, but it goes on to say, if you want to know the value of something ask someone that the essence of time is important!  Today a split second made all the difference in the world. Never will I think of a day, as a burden, such as being long, boring, etc and wishing for another day to come! You better take each second that God gives you.. Another thing I would "trip out on", was growing old! I did not want for that to happen, but after losing someone close to me at a very young age unexpectedly, its a whole lot better than dying young.
Kiss your kids, tell hubby you love him, and enjoy each second your given, its a Blessing!

Peace.

Life is Painful Sometimes!

I think whole-heartenly the worst pain that a mom bears, other than Child birth... is watching your child experience a broken heart! The absolute worst feeling in the world, the experience in which you receive the most growth, and the best opportunity to pull closer to HIM!

I remember mine on a high school level, and then again, several times as an adult! Something you never forget! I always ask myself, and have asked my kids, "What did you learn from this, and how will it make you stronger?  Life always teaches you lessons with each experience that it brings you.... the key is.... and I didn't realize this until a few go-a- rounds in life, is what it shows you,  from repeating the lesson over again!

I think God is all his Glory, has a sense of humor in all of this as well. I don't know about you, but I remember (looking back now it's funny) the silliness of my "first love." I was convinced, at that particular time, that Life as I knew it was over after my first dramatic break-up.  My son and I laugh about it now, or should I say I still tease him, about how he was convinced his eighth grade love was the one for life!

How many of you remember your first love? First heart break? What did you learn from it?